Muslim Life Hackers

Hafsa Taher: Overcoming Mindset Blocks in Business for Women

• Mifrah M • Episode 20

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The episode features Hafsa Taher, a business strategist, who discusses her journey in business and the importance of finding one's purpose. She highlights the significance of balancing inner work, like mindset and self-worth, with outer strategies for success. Key challenges for women, such as impostor syndrome and societal pressures, are explored. Hafsa stresses the importance of changing negative beliefs about money and aligning business goals with personal values. She also discusses the role of self-development and therapy in overcoming obstacles and building confidence.

Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction and Exciting Announcement
02:59 Inner Work vs. Outer Work in Business
03:57 Challenges Women Face in Business
06:33 Money Mindset and Beliefs
08:35 Transforming Negative Beliefs About Money
17:14 Overcoming Worthiness Issues in Business
18:14 The Comparison Game and Entitlement
18:43 Capitalism and Self-Worth
19:45 Redefining Value and Success
20:42 Aligning Intentions with Faith
22:26 Navigating Business with Passion
30:26 The Role of Therapy in Self-Development

About Hafsa Taher:
Hafsa Taher is a certified Muslim life coach trained through DiscoverU's Adwam Coaching program and a business strategist with over 15 years of business experience. Passionate about empowering others, Hafsa's coaching guides sisters through their own paths of fostering resilience, faith, and business growth.

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🏖️ This episode is sponsored by Sisters Explore, a company I founded to offer guided small-group travel for Muslim women to connect, explore, and enjoy faith-centered journeys. Learn more at http://www.sisters-explore.com

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Hafsa Taher:

Money was also a magnifier. It magnifies what's inside you. So if you have the money and it brings out the good in you, it's because you put what is already inside.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Asalamu Alaikum, Muslim Life Hackers, and welcome to the show. I'm your host, Mifrah Mahroof, and I have some good news to share with you all. I'm going to be hosting a retreat in Sri Lanka called the Growth Retreat. This is going to be happening in February 2025, and it's going to be an experiential learning adventure where we will grow together, connect with Allah, and have fun exploring the country. So if this sounds like something you need in your life, I would love to have you join us and get the opportunity to meet you in person. So you can find more information by going to mifrahmahroof.com/retreat. So I'll put a link to that in the show notes. So let's get started with today's episode. So who I have on today is Hafsa Taher. So Hafsa is a certified Muslim life coach trained through the DiscoverU's Adwam coaching program. And she's also a business strategist with over 15 years of experience. She's passionate about inspiring others. Hafsah coaches sisters through their parts of fostering resilience, faith, and business growth. So I hope you enjoy this episode and let's get started. So, from what I know about you, you have been a business strategist for 10 years and you're also a life hacker as well. So I'm very curious to know what was the why behind this? why have you chosen to take this

Hafsa Taher:

parts. Mm-Hmm. So, you know what's funny how a lot of people start with the why? For some people they have to actually do the thing and be like, okay, why am I doing this?

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah, true,

Hafsa Taher:

So I had to work backwards. I wanna say it was like 2000, 2018. So, 2012, I started my own business. Before that, I was working on other people's business. I've been in business for 15 plus years, and I was in business for making products for like about 5 years at that point. And I'm like, you know what? Why am I doing this? Do I want to continue this? Do I want to switch things? So, I did write the book Start With Why. At that point and it really came back to helping like when I started business coaching is helping people that were like lost and not knowing what they were doing. Which is like me when I started, right? That just became my why because I was like, you know what? I know the person who I was and it wasn't so much about like, oh, I don't know how to do the business stuff. It was a lot of like self worth. It was a lot of like, nobody wants to buy my stuff. Oh, I'm not good at this. So why would people buy from me? And all of those thoughts, right? It was just a lot of coaching that I needed when I was then. And there wasn't a lot of people back then. This is like, over 10 years ago, right? So I wanted to help the people like me to be like, okay, I want them to go through the journey I went through to find themselves into the business.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Right. So, it was more like helping them with their inner work in order for them to successfully launch their businesses and grow

Hafsa Taher:

right. So I would say there's two parts to it, right? There's the inner work and the outer work, right? Inner work is the mindset work. The outer work is the strategies and we need that too, right? We need to know how to send emails. We need to know how to optimize our emails. We need to know how to optimize our Instagram posts. What kind of posts work? How to write a caption, right? What's the best way to outline it? What to post, right? These are all the outer work. A lot of times we get stuck in the outer work and we ignore the inner work and then there are people who actually just do the inner work. Oh, I need to work on my perfectionism and I can't move forward until I do that. And they put their outer work, like actually doing the stuff and like working on the business on the back burner because of their life. Oh, I'm not good enough here. I need to like work through my imposter syndrome and then I'll go and do the stuff.

Mifrah Mahroof:

So you see two extremes of the spectrum. Yes, all the time. So that's interesting. So which one do you find though, although you see the two extremes, which one do you find that is most ignored when it comes to women getting into business. What is actually blocking women to start their business? Because the influence in Google, ChatGPT.

Hafsa Taher:

I think the colonized mindset, and so we need to go get education. The colonized mindset is I need a degree. They understand the concept of getting education. And then what happens is when it's about business, they think I should just be able to figure this out. Why can't I figure this out? What is wrong with me? And then not to mention, the women are made to question themselves. and women are way more likely to have imposter syndrome than men. There's actually a book about it. It's called Brave Not Perfect. It's written by a person of, a woman of color. She talks about, she used to teach kids coding in kindergarten kids, like grade one kids. She would see the boys do something and run out there to play. The girls would be there working, working, working on the thing. And the teacher walks by with a blank screen. The teacher like is control Z undo, control Z undo. They see all this work that was there. The girl is like, it wasn't good, it wasn't presentable. So I just deleted it and I don't think it's good enough. Whereas the boys did something and they were like, I'm done. I'm going to go play. So even at that age, I don't know what that is. Nature, nurture. I mean, that's a conversation for another day, maybe. But women question themselves a lot more. They have an imposter syndrome. And they feel like sometimes asking for help or like investing in themselves. I shouldn't need to do that. What's wrong with me? Why can't I figure this out on my own? So it's like a really, there's a lot of ways we are working on ourselves. We are trying to put ourselves out there. We're learning to invest when we need to invest. Like, the both of us know. How important it is to take courses, work with mentors, work with coaches, you had guests who have always also talked about this as well.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah 100%. That's very interesting, how you mentioned about going back to that sense of perfectionism and then feeling like they can never put things out there.

Hafsa Taher:

Yeah.

Mifrah Mahroof:

That's interesting. So did you find though, when they were able to address those inner blocks, they were able to move forward and launch

Hafsa Taher:

It's an ongoing journey. Every level has a new level, right? Because what happens is, the fear of having more money, you know, or I wanted to keep the business small and then I realized you know What like we have companions who made a lot of money, right? They could realize that they're like, okay, I can work through that and then they get stuck. They get to a different level and they're like, you know what? I think I can't go any further than this I don't think I'm capable. I don't think women like me can do this, right? So Every level comes up with a new challenge, I think. So I think the journey never ends. It's like an ongoing journey of working on yourself, like learning the strategies out there. Like you said, AI is the new thing, right? And so the technology is changing, the outer work is changing, the inner work is changing as you're growing as well.

Mifrah Mahroof:

So you mentioned something right there. Fear of money. What's that

Hafsa Taher:

So fear of money might not be the right way of like how these people put it, but they might say things like, Oh, I don't want to make a lot of money. Like I actually had a time. Who's like, Oh, I just want to make enough money to pay for my website. She had a domain name and she had hosting, right? And it wasn't a whole lot. It was worthless hosting, right? It wasn't even make a monthly subscription. Right. And she said, I just want enough to make that. And I was like, why are you just like limiting it to that? She's like, I just want this to pay for itself. That's it. And she did some introspection work. And she said, I think I used to think if I made a lot of money, there'd be a lot of problems because this, she had this experience with this. There's someone close to a family that became really successful. And some, one thing led to the other, one thing led to the other and the concept and the, what ended up happening, that situation, that the person went through a divorce. So in her mind, she made up this story. If I make a lot of money, it's going to impact my family, negatively.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Hmm. I

Hafsa Taher:

see. So she had this blog about money. She had this blog that if I made a lot of money, and then I had another client who said, How can making money so easy for me when it was not for my parents. This whole idea of like our parents was really hard. I will sit here

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. and what was

Hafsa Taher:

right? Yes, money, making money is hard, yes. And now that making money seems easy, oh, but I can't, I shouldn't be making more than my parents. Right? These are all the things when you start digging deep on like, okay, why do I feel that way? Where does this thought come from? Why do I feel like money should be hard to make? All these thoughts and yes, you got to do the work. And for some things, like when you're in the flow and you might just be like, Oh, I do something I'm so good at and I get paid for it. And it might not seem like hard work, but it just comes so naturally to you for sometimes. But for some people, they have these stories that they can tell themselves. Money will make me a bad Muslim. Money will make me a bad parent, a bad spouse, a bad family member, right? Money will make me cause more problems because I wouldn't know what to do with it or I'm going to be bad at managing it.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Hmm. I see. So what are your thoughts on money is going to make me a bad Muslim? Because that's an

Hafsa Taher:

is. In my book club, I run a book club called Strong Believers, and we're reading a book called Billion Dollar Muslim. So we're reading a book called Billion Dollar Muslim. It's written by someone in the U. K. called Malik. And he talks about how having more money is just like having more food at home. You can't say, oh, the people out there that are hungry, so I'm not going to have a lot of food at home. We don't say stuff like that. We just, okay, you know what, if I get a lot of food, that's perfect. I can share it with other people. It's probably a very logical thought. But with money, it feels like one, I think it's a very Christian idea that money is the root of all evil. Right? Oh, that money is actually takes you to the hellfire. Yes, it's a responsibility. And yes, there are things you've got to be careful about, right? Money, honor, prestige, or even any responsibility, right? money is just that. Money was also a magnifier. It magnifies what's inside you. So if you have the money and it brings out the good in you, it's because you put what is already inside. So having money allows you to do so much good. Is it a responsibility? Does it mean that got to learn to make sure you pay zakat on time, make sure you purify your wealth? Yes. Just like anything out there, right? When you have an additional responsibility and an additional honor of privilege, you got to make sure it's used properly

Mifrah Mahroof:

Hmm. True. I really like the analogy about money being like extra food at home. It sounds really funny when you

Hafsa Taher:

can compare it to like sandwiches. He's like, no, I don't want a sandwich because I'm going to be a bad person if I have too many sandwiches.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. True. Right. Because like if you have a lot of sandwiches, you can just give it away. But then, like you said, it depends on who you are, because if you're a natural hoarder, you might be like, Oh, I want to freeze those sandwiches.

Hafsa Taher:

right. And that might not be a bad idea, like you were like, you know what?

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah, it might not be a bad idea, but maybe you might have to buy another freezer to accommodate all the sandwiches.

Hafsa Taher:

right. So maybe the intention is I'm going to freeze all these sandwiches so I have more time to work, to do more good things, right? Again, it goes back to the intention, right?

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. yeah. True. True. There's so many ways you can go about with it because money is definitely the power of today's time,

Hafsa Taher:

Yes. And I think money has this negative connotation to it, like in our heads, but that's why it doesn't feel the same as sandwiches. Doesn't feel the same as food. Like, we wouldn't say the stuff we say about money, they would the same things. We wouldn't say the same thing about sandwiches like that. But when you replace the word, you're like, you don't have that emotional attachment or the emotional, what's keeping you away from it, right? Like with money, we have this thing about like, oh, I don't want it, you know? It's going to make me a bad person, it's going to make me a bad Muslim, it's going to create more problems for me, and our minds are designed to keep us safe, so we find ways to keep ourselves safe in what fits our stories, right?

Mifrah Mahroof:

Wow, that's amazing. There's, like so much going on in our heads that's stopping us from just like taking an action, because if you go Google it or chatGPT in, you know, do ABCD. And then it's like, why can't I

Hafsa Taher:

that's right, That's right, yes, 100%. So I actually did a boot camp called Bust Your BS Beliefs. BS is an acronym for belief systems, from one of our mentors, Sheikh Muhammad Al Sharif Rahimullah, he would call belief system BS because I mean, our belief system is BS sometimes, right? We have made up all these stories, said, Oh, you know what? If I make more money, this is going to happen. If I become successful, this is going to happen. A lot of BS stories that we made up, right? So I once did a workshop called BS Belief Buster, and we talked about all the negative beliefs most people have, how to be like, okay, this is the negative belief I have, once I have that, I know this is the consequence of it, but that's not the result I want. This is the new result I want, what belief do I need to have, right? And changing beliefs takes time, but at least you got to be open to that belief. Like, okay, I will be open to this belief that money is not a bad thing.

Mifrah Mahroof:

So would you say a new belief would sound something like money's not a bad

Hafsa Taher:

thing. Yeah. And not the other extreme would be, I love money, right? I mean, you're so averse to money right now. You can go to the extreme and your mind's like, that's BS. So I actually had a money block too. So Sheikh Muhammad Al Sharif Rahimullah in the Western mind, what he did is that was really smart. He started, he took my belief as like a table. He started pulling the legs under the table. He's like, okay, why do you have that

Mifrah Mahroof:

believe

Hafsa Taher:

It was such a smart thing. Alhamdulillah, I really think that made a huge transformation for me. It was that

Mifrah Mahroof:

That's the power of good mentors, right?

Hafsa Taher:

right? And like

Mifrah Mahroof:

Amazing. They just call

Hafsa Taher:

This is like, over 4 years ago now, SubhanAllah, like, made me a Sadaqah Jariyah, of all the good I do, made me a Sadaqah Jariyah for him, right? So he takes your belief, and he'd be like, okay, why do you think that's true? And I'll be like, because this, this, this happened. And what if that person wasn't even talking to you? What if that person was wrong? What if that person was talking about somebody else, not to you, right? and then I was like, oh, but then this is what happened to the other person. And he's like, are you sure that's the full story? Did you go into their house and see what they do? Right? So he started pulling the legs from under the belief, the old belief. So he's like, okay, now it's a wobbly belief, right? Now you need a new belief to replace that. You're like, okay, that doesn't make sense anymore. Okay. What do I want to believe then? Money is not such a bad thing. Money can make good things happen too, right? It's not, oh, I love money. It's not from one extreme to the other extreme. It's kind of like in between the two. Okay, money might not be such a bad thing because you want to give your brain like something that's believable, not like extremes. Sometimes affirmations are like that, like they're so extreme that you can't even connect with them. So I feel like you've got to go from the old belief to something like that, but a little bit neutral to the new belief.

Mifrah Mahroof:

So it's not like a drastic change. 100%

Hafsa Taher:

percent yeah, because your brain is like, what the hell? Yeah, Yeah,

Mifrah Mahroof:

I see. So it's interesting. You said that, we shouldn't jump all the way to like the belief of I love money, but then you could say, I love sandwiches

Hafsa Taher:

yeah, you could. But then can you feel that in yourself and say, I really genuinely love money, right? and you want to get to that place maybe where you're like, okay, I love the good I can do with money. I wanna be able to give this much zakat. I wanna be able to like, you know I really interesting what somebody in like which is the cause for duas, they took a screenshot, they were on this website for fundraising website. You know, like on some platforms you can click on the top donors, you can see how much like other people gave. So they clicked on the top donors. And the person on that website had given like$10,000 a top donor. So they took a screenshot of that and changed and put their own name then they said, I want to be this person who can give$10,000. Right? I was like that. right? I was just like mind blown. I'm like, you know what? Like, you don't even think like that. Sometimes you like, imagine just like sitting there, somebody sends you a link saying, Oh, my friend's fundraising for this person, the storm, the hurricane, whatever the relief workers. Lebanon now, and you get that link and you're like, okay, 10,000 right there, it's okay. Didn't even make a dent anywhere. Right. to be able to do that.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah, yeah, true. Because even for Allah SWT like$1 is like the same as$10,000. We're the one, that's right, who's giving it significance.

Hafsa Taher:

And also Islamically, we are meant to have money in our hands, not a heart. Not to be so attached to it and to be like, Every up and down is like taking a breath away. It's like, Oh, the stock's been down. Oh no, my money, my money, my money. Right. Obviously you want to like balance that with your risk levels, but yeah.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. True. It's a very important point you mentioned because if we do have money in our hearts, then sometimes like it's a blessing that Allah SWT hasn't given money to a certain person, because maybe that could be a source of a lot of trial for them. that they can't handle and maybe just having a little bit of money was sufficient for them. But for someone who feels like, Hey, I can do a lot of good with money. I can manage it and give and do all these amazing things. Then it's a different story, but I think like you were saying, like we tend to have this money is an evil thing and let's not go near money. So then a lot of us are not succesfull when work.

Hafsa Taher:

That's right. Yeah.

Mifrah Mahroof:

getting out and doing a business, right?

Hafsa Taher:

Yes. So it's so important to work to that inner dialogue, inner talk, inner belief system, the BS, to be like, what's my thought, what's my belief about this? Which they thought that's causing me to feel this way, right? So when you're able to do the inner work, like for me, it was like writing it down to be like, actually see it in writing. And I'm like, what the heck? Like, I believe that. And when you take that belief out, it's kind of like one of those playing card houses, you pull one card out, the whole thing coming down, right? Because you built the entire structure of that one B is belief, right? So when you pull the false belief out, you're like, Oh, wait, that thought doesn't exist anymore. Okay, bye. Okay. Nevermind, nevermind.

Mifrah Mahroof:

What other challenges did you have when you were getting into this business space? the first one I'm hearing is the money beliefs, what else was coming up?

Hafsa Taher:

Okay, the other part of it is use measuring your worthiness with the income you make, right? So, it's kind of like with business, I mean, there are all these entrepreneurs and business owners talking about, Okay, I had a 10k month, I had a 10k week, I had a 5k day, right? There are all these numbers being thrown around and you here are like, okay, I made a hundred dollars yesterday and I haven't made anything else the entire month, right? And number one, it's such a obvious thing to be like, okay, who are you comparing yourself to? What's other in chapter 25 and new chapter two, right? But we forget about that. We forget that there's more to what we see. More to what we don't see, right? We like, okay, we assume like, okay. They are making 100k a month. I should have been there too. Do they have a team that they are, like, spending the entire thing over? Are they in the negatives? Who cares? They are making that much. I should be making

Mifrah Mahroof:

True. That might not even be their take home, right?

Hafsa Taher:

I should be making that much too, right? So it's kind of that comparison game to be like, okay, I should be doing that much too. And ultimately, I think there's like a little bit of entitlement, like, I have been working so hard, I have been promoting this, nobody is buying. Well, nobody owes us anything, right? Is there like work I need to do on my marketing? Do I need to understand? Like, do I need to get more clear about what I'm offering, right? There needs to be some introspection too. But like this whole idea of like, I'm as worthy as the amount of money I make. We live in a very capitalistic society. That's trained us to think about productivity as money making activities, you know, or like a job, a business, right? Like a woman who stays at home might feel like, Oh, I've not been productive. What? Like I don't do anything in any ways, right? Like I don't do anything, right? So we live in a very capitalistic society that is really focused on money. So what ends up happening is, because we live and breathe in that model, we measure our own worthiness with money, right? It's like, oh, I'm only worthy when I'm making money. Okay, business struggling when 2020 COVID happened, a lot of my clients cancelled, and that would have been time if I hadn't done the inner work, I would have been like, I suck, nobody wants to work with me anymore, right? Versus being like, okay, what's the situation in the world right now? What's happening? But there was a time when I would be like, okay, if I'm not making money, who am I anyways, right? I just, I'm supposed to be making money. I'm supposed to be doing better than this. So this whole idea of worthiness that comes from how much you make.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. Yeah. That whole part about that capitalist mentality that seeps into these areas of our life and about how women who, you know, like they're measured both by money and it's sad because it's not like that.

Hafsa Taher:

No, no, a hundred percent. And then even the ones that are making money, say like have job. And then they go through some kind of life change, a new season of life, whether they get move away, they have to take time off from their work. They have taken the only metric that was measuring their worthiness, it's been taken, it doesn't exist anymore. The amount of money they've got, right? Now they're like, Oh, who am I now? Like that was the only metric they had. They were holding onto them. Now they're like, okay, I'm not making the money. What am I doing with my life? Who am I anymore? Because that was the only value that went on value of the measure of worthiness they had.

Mifrah Mahroof:

So how do you look at value?

Hafsa Taher:

I think we are inherently valuable. So there isn't anything external that actually makes us valuable, right? As a creation of Allah, our worthiness is there, isn't it a hadith that says, like, a human being is more sacred than the Kaaba. There's things we wouldn't harm the Kaaba, but we don't think twice before hurting another human being, another brother or sister in Islam, right? But treat ourselves as unworthy. And I think, again, Catholicist society, and again, how people see us, how we see ourselves. When you study the names of Allah SWT, you're able to understand who He is, and see who you are, as well. I think understanding the names of Allah SWT, how merciful He is, how just He is, how wise He is, how much He appreciates. I think that was one name of Allah SWT that really, really changed the way I look at, like, the outcome, appreciates. That means, even me trying, even if I'm not making that 100k a month, I tried and he appreciates that. He rewards me for that, right? And, right, and then me thinking, okay, I didn't make the money, but Allah doesn't see that. Allah looks at my heart. What did I do? Did I try? Did I do my best, right? So it adds, it's 100%, like, takes the only measure of success I had the money and replaces it with, who is judging me? who is the one who is actually rewarding me, who is the one who is actually looking at my work and thinking, am I doing a good job or not, right? Now you're like, okay, as long as I'm trying, as long as I'm doing my best, I'm worthy, and as long as I'm doing my best, Allah is rewarding me.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. Yeah. True. And I wonder if that thought process would happen if you got into business for the right reasons and not just to get in because everyone says, Oh, this is the place to make

Hafsa Taher:

money. That's right.

Mifrah Mahroof:

get 10K,

Hafsa Taher:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's really interesting because I was at a speed networking event, speed networking. So it was like a speed dating, but for networking. And one woman was like, okay, I want to start an export business. Where's the most money? And I'm like, I think you should be asking yourself, what do you like? What are you passionate about? Because this combination of, I love this. I'm good at this. This is what my experience is. This is what I can talk about. This is what I appreciate. And this is what the market needs. Like that combination, the one diagram, right? The three circles, where do they merge. Because what do people need is where the money is too, right? So, because you can do something for the money, but how much heart is in there? How much passion is in there? How much interest is in there, right? when I was in school, I finished college. My friend would send me lists of like Google articles like, oh, here's a list of 15 businesses we can start. And I'm like, I don't care about any of these.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah.

Hafsa Taher:

So I definitely think there has to be like an interest in there for you to be like, okay, why am I doing this? Yes. The bigger why, but also do I even care about this?

Mifrah Mahroof:

I feel like this is not like said enough because online, when you go to business, you'd be like, Oh, the top 10 business ideas and look how much I'm making. And it's like, that is the conversation in the business space. It's like the capitalist mentality, right? It's All about the money. Like the thing you were worshipping is the money.

Hafsa Taher:

That's right. It starts then and ends there. Yes.

Mifrah Mahroof:

So it's really aligning your intention back to Allah and

Hafsa Taher:

think about it

Mifrah Mahroof:

knowing that he's the one who's giving you

Hafsa Taher:

the money. Yeah. Think about it this way, two things that come to me, we want at the end of the day and on the day of judgment, we want all of the things we did to show up on the right scape, like on the right hand side. And if we make the intention of praising Allah, like one of my mentors said, like just recently. A couple of months ago, she said, every morning make the intention, Oh Allah, everything I do today, I do it for your sake. And I'm going to forget this sometimes, remind me and accept it for your sake. Accept it for your sake, and intentions change all the time, and one of the teachers said, intentions are like a toddler, they keep running away. So, you got to keep bringing them back and be like, okay, reminding yourself why you're doing that, you'll get that. So it's really important to keep in mind, like. Yes, I have to keep purifying my intention because I want this to count on the day of judgment. Actions are by intention, right? So actions are judged by their intention. So every action I do, I want to make sure I'm getting rewarded for it. Because what if we work so hard here and then on the Day of Judgment, there's nothing for us to show for. So we want to make sure everything we do is done with the right intention, even if it's like, I don't work with Muslim women, say for example, like I don't teach Islam, I don't teach people to pray, I'm not doing all those work, but my intentions are to learn and halal living, right? That's good I don't have to be in a Muslim business. Earning a halal living. So, making sure that you are making that intention in the morning or when you start doing something or whatever you remember and being mindful of that. And the other thing is I read a Christian book once that talked about how God is your migrating manager. God is the one who is actually bringing you the clients. I was reading this book when COVID happened, that's why it stuck with me. So, you know, how we look at our website and like, Oh, I'm not getting the sales. I'm not getting the sales. Okay. How many people clicked on my thing today? Oh, nobody clicked. How many people opened my email? Nobody signed up, right? But Allah SWT is providing us sustenance in so many other ways, but I'm like focused on this one thing. And put my head down and I'm like, I want to see it here and there's like stuff all around me, so sometimes we think that the risk, the sustenance is not coming, but sometimes the channel is blocked. But the other channels, the other channels, the other like pipelines, because the source is still Allah. it's like saying, okay, you're opening the faucet in your kit, in your washroom. And they're like, there's no water anywhere. And then somebody else would be like, listen, there's just no water here. It's okay. There's water in the entire house, you know? All the other taps are fine. All the other faucets are fine. Right? But you are standing at that long faucet and being like, there is no money here. Why? How come I'm not making the money? But you are being blessed in so many different ways, right? And sometimes there's different types of risks. Sometimes you're getting a free program, a free course. Sometimes you're getting, a membership to something you didn't pay for. Sometimes you're getting an opportunity, a free webinar, a free download that you got that gives you this insight that you never thought was possible, right? That you couldn't even looking for, right? So Allah can be opening doors for you of like risk and sustenance in so many ways. But we stay focused on thinking it has to come from this place only. Yeah, it

Mifrah Mahroof:

sounds like there is again, that attachment to money. It's like money is the only form of risk, whereas risk can be a good word, people, ideas, or even things making sense to you. Like how many times have we both consumed something and it didn't click until later, that click. It's from Allah, right?

Hafsa Taher:

My friend, she has a dua, she made a post a long time ago. She said, one of my students made this dua, Oh Allah, Yaa Fattah, the opener. Ya Fattah open doors for me that I didn't even know were closed. I love that so much. Because you don't even know.

Mifrah Mahroof:

That's

Hafsa Taher:

beautiful. Yeah, you don't even know what exactly that's gonna look like. Ya Fattah, opened doors for me that I didn't even know were closed.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah, I think it's really coming back to that decolonizing our mindsets and seeing that it's not just about the

Hafsa Taher:

Mm-Hmm.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Which by the way, paper money, obviously it's not real. It's important to have these conversations and for us to really challenge what we believe, because these could be the very blockers that's stopping us from achieving What we want in our lives. And if it's business, which is our goal. And I've seen many street sisters and I'm sure that you've seen it more. They've been saying they want to have a business and then many years go by and they're still

Hafsa Taher:

in the same place.

Mifrah Mahroof:

business.

Hafsa Taher:

Yes. Yes, yes.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah.

Hafsa Taher:

Yeah. I get that.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Actually, what do you say to that? If they're in the same place like three years later, they're still in the same place. What would you tell them to do?

Hafsa Taher:

What would I tell them to do the same place for three years? I'm like, you just don't want, just accept it. Oh, it's nice to have fancy vanity kind of du'as, or you're almost like, I need to lose weight. I need to drink more water. Right. Do I care about that? No, I don't. I need to have a business. It's kind of like, Oh, it'll be cool. I don't care about it. Obviously, if you've not done anything with me, you don't care. Because if you cared enough about it, if you really wanted it, you'd have at least started something. You would have figured something out on your own. Yeah. I mean, you know what? Like, either we can spend time on something or we can spend money. And some people have money and some people have time. When you have this you have the time you're like, okay, I will

Mifrah Mahroof:

and the better type of risk,

Hafsa Taher:

yes exactly. Yes. So to be able to be like, okay You know what? I have extra time. I'm gonna watch some YouTube videos I'm gonna listen to the podcast and get inspired right read some books and get inspired and if you have the money, work with the coach and be like, okay, I really want to do this, but I have no idea how to get started I even tried asking ChatGPT and I'm still stuck. And then you're able to work with the coach and be like, okay, this is my goal. This is where I want to get to. What are the baby steps I need to take? Because you can only start, you can only eat an elephant one bite at a time. Don't imagine it. Don't picture it.

Mifrah Mahroof:

At the end of the day, I'm just thinking about the elephants because I was looking up a lot of elephant parks in Sri Lanka and I was like, oh, look, all these elephants.

Hafsa Taher:

That's right. You can only eat an elephant one bite at a time.

Mifrah Mahroof:

They're massive animals, I don't know if talalteed animal, I mean elephant, FYI, if anyone listening, we're talking about eating elephants.

Hafsa Taher:

Yes, please do let us know. I'm going to change that analogy to something else then.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Alhamdulillah. All right. Well, we're actually close to ending up interview. There's so many things we can touch upon and, MashaAllah, there's a lot I can learn from you, but time is time. So we'll just go straight to our questions that we have here. What is one life hack that you found improved your life?

Hafsa Taher:

I think it was self development. I think we started to read a lot of books, listen to podcasts and then working with the therapist because again, like seeing those blogs, sometimes a coach can do that for you. Sometimes you need a therapist to be able to be like, where's that story coming from. To be able to like really undo it, especially if it's deeper, like childhood phase, sometimes you need a therapist for that, right? And it's not like a lifelong thing that you need. The therapist will teach you strategies to be like, okay, when you have thoughts like these, this is the kind of thing you apply to it. This is the kind of tools, they empower you with the tools and they like last you for your entire life. And here's the thing I always say, Your ceiling will become the floor to your children. So, do the best you can. Improve yourself. Work on yourself. It is so powerful, right? Your ceiling is going to become the floor to them. So do it for their sake. Give them a higher floor than you had.

Mifrah Mahroof:

All right, let's, yeah, I'm just like processing. I was like, oh my gosh.

Hafsa Taher:

That's right. Your ceiling is the floor to your kids.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah, like I've always thought about this, especially with my daughter, but the way you're wording it is like, okay.

Hafsa Taher:

I heard it from someone else. Yes.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah. All right. But I'm actually curious that you mentioned that part about therapists. How would you go about finding a good therapist can work for you? Because a lot of people will say experiences like, Oh, I went to a

Hafsa Taher:

therapist, it didn't work. Yeah. There's a lot of different types of therapists. Modalities. Yes. Something like that. Yes. Modalities. Yes. There's a lot of different coaches have different modalities. Some are talk therapy, some are more somatic therapy, like where do you feel that in your body kind of thing, right? Yeah. Some are more like movement kind. Some are more like, okay, let's take that thought you have and let's come up with a more neutral thought. Like, let's see where that thought came from. Everybody's different, right? So I have had a therapist that was CBT trained, Cognitive Behavior Therapy. I think that is really good in some things, but I've also worked with an EMDR specialist, which is like eye movement. They basically change your beliefs to eye movement, right? So thinking, like really getting a feel for what the different therapists are there and booking one session with them. And you can't like decide if the therapist is right for you after one session, you have to stick with them for like at least three, four sessions, because the first one could just be information intake, right? We're just asking you questions to figure out like, what are you dealing with? What do you need help with? So don't jump the gun on the first session. I almost did that. I'm like, no, this isn't the right thing for me. And I still go back to my therapist when I need it, right? So I would say, it definitely takes time. Be patient, try different modalities. Whether it's somatic therapy, there's good in everyone. It's like, what do I need? Where are you seeing the most results? Where, what do you need at what time? So it takes time. And then still there's specific things I'm like, you know what, when I get stuck in my head, I go to my blood therapist, right? But if something else comes up that I need to really process it in my body, like I know I'll have a lot of back pain, a lot of shoulder pain, or I know like there's something really from my childhood that's, that I need to process, Somatic therapy, but there's so many more, right? So there are a lot more therapy, now that'll be immuno therapist, therapists that are Muslim now, they have the Islamic awareness to it, Islamic side added to it, right? Like they hold the connection between the ruh and the qobiliyati al-aql right. So that I able to look at it from an Islamic perspective too. So that's lot of options out there. So yeah, give it a shot and say bismillah and look for testimonials again, like Arfa was saying. Talk to people, look for testimonials, but you won't know until you actually give it a try sometimes.

Mifrah Mahroof:

True. Alhamdulillah. Okay. And, what would you say is a book or books that's helped you level up in your life? Cause I know you spoke

Hafsa Taher:

Yes, yes, yes, There are a lot actually. I think books, I probably read like 50 books in one year, like one at one point.

Mifrah Mahroof:

That's amazing.

Hafsa Taher:

I know I was just on this knowledge binge, but then again, that was a lot of inner work. I had to go back into the outer work, right? So, bringing it full circle back to the beginning again. So a lot of inner workbooks, I think this is a good combination. You know, Self Compassion, Kristen Neff is a really good one because we're so hard on ourselves. Oh, this should be easy for us. Why do I have to ask for help? I suck if I have to ask for help, right? A lot of these self compassion conversations. Self Compassion is a good one. How to be single and happy. Even if you're not single, I think you will learn to see life differently. How to be single and happy. If you are single, definitely take a look at that book, and I know sometimes you feel like if I get to this goal, my life, all my problems will be solved, right? It's so funny when I talk about how to be single and happy because we saw it, we met when we were both single.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Yeah, yeah. True. right? Yeah. We go

Hafsa Taher:

That's right. Yes. Yes. Yes, Alhamdulillah. Maybe you just got it when we met. I know, but yeah, how to be single and happy and then Playing Big by Tara Mohr, M O H R, is the last thing. Playing big is really good because all the things about the things that we are trained in the society to be quiet, play it small, not make too much noise, right? As women, we are taught to be almost invisible, like really shrink down to fit other people, play it small, but playing big is really good. So tell them all playing big, how to be single and happy. I forgot to write the name of the author, but I'm sure this is the only book with that title. How to be single and happy, Self Compassion. Brave Not Perfect was the other one that we started off with, but yeah, there's a lot of books that you can come back to me for.

Mifrah Mahroof:

put them into the show notes, so that nobody needs to take any notes

Hafsa Taher:

That's great.

Mifrah Mahroof:

find it in the show notes. So awesome. Okay. And Hafsa, where can our listeners find

Hafsa Taher:

you? Awesome. I think Instagram is probably the best place. Hafsataher.com, hafsataher.coaching is the Instagram handy. Please send me a DM and tell me you listen to the podcast. I'd love to connect and see what resonated with your biggest takeaway. InshaAllah.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Oh, wonderful. Well, thank you so much for coming on.

Hafsa Taher:

Thank you for having me.

Mifrah Mahroof:

Hey everyone. That wraps up another episode from the Muslim Life Hackers podcast. I really hope you enjoyed our chat today. I've got some great takeaways. if you like what you heard and don't want to miss out on our next conversations, hit that subscribe button on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you're listening to this from. It means a lot to us, and it helps us reach more people who can benefit from this show. Thank you again for tuning in. Until next time, keep striving and getting better every day.

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Mifrah Mahroof

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